What is Same Sex Sexual Attraction?
I see same sex sexual attraction as a projection of self-insecurities onto others. i.e. What I feel I'm lacking, when I see them in other men, I want them. I think I can cannibalise them into me. Most gay/SSA men feel low in confidence and perceive other men as confident. Similarly we feel "less of a man" for various reasons (being short, missing social cues, scars, having a small penis, being objectified, not being athletic, appearing weak, not having enough body hair, etc). So those things make it onto our list of "masculine imperatives" - essential things for real men to have. We say, "Real men have these things and I don't." Unfortunately we've defined a fiction and put ourselves outside the box. It's self-condemnation, which becomes self-hatred, and self-shaming. We look for differences between ourselves and other men. Even if I'm taller, more muscular, and more confident than another man, I will ignore those and see that he's ...