SA Meeting 10-May


Tonight we read from an Alcoholics Anonymous book. It was stories of men - one who had been sober for 25 years, retired at 55, got regularly drunk, and died within 4 years. Another had a good day, let his guard down, and thought, “It couldn’t hurt”, got drunk , and the next day wondered, “How did that ever happen?!”
Some comments that resonated were:

  • My brain is damaged and I won’t ever be a “normal” person again (able to drink responsibly);
  • If I have “self confidence”, that’s really arrogance;
  • Acting out happens when I’m “off guard”
  • Lust triggers more lust and my brain doesn’t function normally (so cutting out all lust/dopamine is key);
  • Knowledge nor willpower doesn’t help 
  • What works is working the steps including focusing on my spirituality and relying on God. 

I’ve definitely cut out a lot of Dopamine by cutting out unhelpful social media and contacts. So I’m my workout app I have no friends and so it’s not a social media app now. I deleted my Instagram account, which was a source of hits of dopamine. I’ve deleted a lot of contacts of strong-looking men, gay men, and SSA men who are not on the same path as me. The only two men who I’ve remained in contact with from Instagram are Adam from the UK and Piero from Perth. Both I consider safe, and are married with kids. I had deleted their messages but they had contacted me. Adam is a Christian and genuinely seems interested in my welfare. I’m not attracted to him. Piero also seems genuinely encouraging and we have similar personalities. I will admit he has an attractive body, but I have not lusted after him. I am planning to catch up with him briefly when I’m in Perth and we’ll do a workout together. 

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